F you Maths... Faths.

Every March since I was in middle school I end up coming home crying.
Its unbearable. Not only do I have to suffer through the pollen, but I also have to deal with people coming up to me and asking me what’s wrong.

Take today for instance.

I was walking from my math class to the dining hall, and I was stopped twice. Then, when I was in line, I was asked again.

I’m not angry, if anything it kinda makes me happy to know that random strangers want to see me happy, but I secretly know that they are just satisfying their own need at knowing everyone else’s drama.

Okay, stepping back. I know there are nice people in the world who actually do care and aren’t all egotistical and stuff. But I’m going to admit it now that I’m not one of those people, so unless it’s a friend, I don’t really care.

Okay, ouch, now I just sound like a jerk.

FORGET I SAID ANYTHING.

Okay, so I have allergies. And they only come out for about two weeks mid-March. So I shouldn’t complain.

But IT SUCKS.

Like, half of my face is constantly balled up in a weirdo sneer, with a twitchy eye. So I look like I’m constantly smelling something bad, but only on one side, and I’m really sad about it.

Not an attractive look.

Well, today I’m kind of glad I have the whole allergy cover-up cause I just took my math final. It took me over two hours. And the first problem, about bacteria in frozen chicken, was nearly impossible. And then, to make matters worse, it was one of those multi step problems, so if you got the first part wrong, the WHOLE THING is wrong. And I’m pretty sure I got the first part wrong. So I guess I’ll never know how many bacteria’s a frozen chicken is packaged with. Darn.

Tomorrow is my Linguistics exam. I’m sure to have better luck with that, even though I haven’t studied nearly as much as I did for math.

I always have wondered if the more right-sided/left-sided brain thing is true. Like, I know they proved that the left side of the brain is associated with language, writing and thinking and the right side is all creative. Well, it doesn’t make sense to me which side I prefer. Because, while I’m terrible at math, I rock at science and have common sense and am pretty logical. I also love classical music, which is apparently associated with the left side. But I also love to write creative fiction (that’s like using both sides at once) and paint and organize things. So, basically, I’m pretty equal in both sides, which is ideal, but that still doesn’t prove anything. Like, am I terrible at math because my brain is wired that way, or is it just that I don’t really care/ never understood the basics?

I was put in GT when I was in sixth grade. I don’t remember anything about that class other than Christine was in it and I didn’t like it because we had to do math without counting on our fingers (which I still can’t do, just fyi). I remember crying once in class cause I was so frustrated and the teacher taking me out in the hall. And honestly, the best memory that I had of that class is the moment that she bent down to ask me what was wrong and I could see up her shirt. And she wasn’t wearing a bra.

*disclaimer: I was at the height where, when she stooped, it was EXACTLY in my eye line. It’s not like I went looking down her shirt or something.*

Then, when I didn’t get into the GT school (thank goodness), I was put into the Algebra 1 class instead of taking another year of basic math like everyone else. My teacher was Ms. Banard. The only reason I remember that is because I had to go see her after class almost every day.

I just never understood math. No matter how hard I try, no matter how many formulas I memorize, it just doesn’t seem to click.

So, cross your fingers that I passed the math midterm, because if not it means you'er going to get a lot more complaining.